All is well.
It's been a while since I wrote. I don't know why I have no urge to reflect on my life these days. Maybe I'm finally living in the present? Huh, I don't think so. I feel exhausted from doing anything else besides working, eating, and sleeping. Sometimes I feel like a rock that sits around the same spot and doesn't make any effort to move. Hmm…, do I want to stay like this? Or do I want to change and return to being the dreamy, ambitious girl I was?
I have no idea who I am right now. I keep posing questions to myself. Am I living my true self? What's my true self? Am I honest? Am I kind? Am I the person that people think of me? What is one's true self? What is the point of living? Is it right for me to judge myself when everyone is super tiny in the entirety? Yeah, I should go easy on myself. I need to be kind to myself too.
I do not have to be like someone else. I just have to be me.
I don't know how to express my thoughts and feelings in words. But, I know one thing for sure. Whenever I push myself to do something, I will ask myself whether I genuinely want this or whether I think I am supposed to do this.
In the end, it's not that I am living to be liked by others or to be on the same board as others. All I want is to be happy.
